


Phone call

by Veelitann



Series: Beyong the Heart of Outer Space [4]
Category: Gundam Wing
Genre: Angst, G-Boys, M/M, Spy - Freeform, mission
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-07
Updated: 2016-06-07
Packaged: 2018-07-12 21:13:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,145
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7122790
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Veelitann/pseuds/Veelitann
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Missions have never been my thing, for as long as I remember. But talking with them, with him, through the microphone and my earpiece might make it better...<br/>I thought so. </p>
<p><b>AC198</b><br/>[POV Quatre]</p>
            </blockquote>





	Phone call

**Author's Note:**

> Another part of their life again! Even if it's not perfect, I'm so happy that I can finaly work on all this ! 
> 
> Plus...Dears, I didn't expect people to actually read it, and you even gave me nice reviews. Thank you so much, this means a lot to me.

**AC198**

The silence.

I had always been someone to show a full self-confidence. Actually, being social had never been a problem to me. Vanishing in the air, as if I had never been here at all, too. All around me, the soft darkness of the end of the day was starting to be more and more pronounced with the fading light of the sun. I could admire a ray of light coming through the half close shutters, full of grains of dust from its birth to the greyish old wooden floor. 

" _Hey, Quat', are you ok?_ "

"Mh, yeah."

The tip of my finger was stuck to my ear to make the small earpiece stay in place in a better way. My ear had always been to small for that type of equipment. Duo's voice sometimes resonnated, keeping me from thinking too much or, even, from sleeping, and that wasn't a bad thing. I'd left the Preventer base a few days ago for that spying mission and it was already the fourth time he was giving a call, checking for me and some news. 

" _How's it going then?_ "

"That's quite a quiet place," I sighed. 

With my bottom set on the floor in a thick lay of dust, it _had_ to be at least quiet during the day. 

I heard Duo exhale deeply in my ear. " _That's not what I mean, Quat._ " It made me smile, I could picture his face, jaded at my answer. 

I laughed a little. "I know, sorry." 

" _Did something happen? Where's Une? _"__

__"Still in her hotel. Doesn't seem she's heading anywhere tonight."_ _

__" _Don't let you gard down, Quatre,_ " said another voice, and I assumed that Duo had put on the loud speaker. He wasn't alone, so the four of them -Duo, Heero, Wufei and Trowa- could hear and talk to me. At the idea, I swallowed thickly, making the sudden lump bubble in the depth of my throat. _ _

__"Thanks, Heero, that's sweet of you," I only said to the man. With the time passing by, the Japanese had learnt some tips not to always be in marge, and sometimes he was able to say something, well...Not that he was really nice or even trying to be, but he had softened since that time when we were fighting against the Alliance and OZ_ _

__" _You're welcome,_ " Heero growled, more because he was being shy under my words than because he was polite -he never was, too used to go around with Duo to actually even know what _polite_ could possibly mean. _ _

__I stretched a leg, not going too far as I was soon stopped by the old table in the middle of the small room. The floor was so dusty that my feet let tracks through the dirt. The place smelt as if something decayed was hidden behind a furniture for months and I couldn't open the windows to refresh the vitiated air; I was in a mission, I couldn't be seen, found or the worst that could happen : caught. I was here to spy, something I had always been quite good at, surprisingly. Or rather, everyone was shocked when the Preventers gave the results from all our missions until now, even when we weren't part of the organisation. I mean, when we were the Gundam pilots, when we were teenagers. Not so long ago._ _

__I was the second after Duo. It wasn't a surprise about him, didn't he even steal his Gundam before using it? On purpose, of course. But he did nonetheless and I was kind of admirative about his exploits._ _

__I cought a little because of the amount of dust flying in the air, finding my breath back quickly._ _

__" _What is it?_ " I heard another voice in my ear and Duo sneered at the question. _ _

__"Dust allergy," I mumbled for a quick explanation. It wasn't Heero's voice, I knew it, and I first felt a little panicked. I shouldn't._ _

__" _Do you have something for this? Your inhaler?_ " Duo gave a try, and I knew that it wasn't really for the sake of the fucking inhaler -it wouldn't make any difference in the case of an allergy and we both were aware that he didn't know a thing about that type of things. _ _

__"Forgot it," I sighed. "It's ok, I can deal with it."_ _

__It was difficult to be relying on their voices only. Alone in this dark room, sitting back against the wall and the window by my side so nobody could see my figure, I could only hear my own breath and the sound of my sniffings due to the dust._ _

__"Ah, shit," I mumbled again when my nose tickled again, threatening to make me sneeze._ _

__" _Eh?_ "_ _

__"That place was the worst idea you had, Duo. Or the best, if you were you planing to kill me here and now, actually."_ _

__I could here Duo's crystalline laughter in my ear, and it made me smile softly. Duo's exhilaration was something exceptional and his joy had always made me able to do things I thought I could never. Duo himself was something exceptional. To me, he was exceptional. I never had to force myself not to hear Duo's feelings; I never heard them, no matter what. With Duo, I never spent nights waiting for the sun to raise with anxiety, I never had to feel my heart filled with feelings I couldn't understand myself, I never had to take his pain deep in my chest against my own will._ _

__Being a Newtype had alwayd been the worst part of my life, and I was just starting to understand how to use my abilities. Until now, I only could take things like they were coming to me, without thinking about it, without even realizing I was doing this or that. Scanning people feelings wasn't something I did on purpose. It was my way to go through everything and thanks to it, I was able to act according everyone's will. It was my only way to do as my father wanted me to, until the day I left, lost in my rebellion.  
The day come that my behaviour wasn't welcome. The feeling I had got had been weird, and for a moment I had felt lost. _ _

__I was scared, feeling my cocoon breaking under those harsh green eyes every time he was looking at me through my power. So I fought myself. That guy didn't want me to enter his mind, and I hadn't need to feel it. He had rejected me with all his strength, maybe without knowing it himself._ _

__Trowa Barton had rejected what I had built since the first day we met._ _

__I sighed, barely listening to what the other pilots were saying in their microphone. I sighed, maybe too deeply because I heard Duo press on a button, the soft 'click' making me wince for a second. The buzz surrounding him had suddenly disapeared, and only his voice came in the microphone after I heard him fumble for a moment._ _

__" _What's going on?_ " He was talking with a low voice, and I had to bit a little at my low lips at the idea that Duo had left the others just to talk to me in a more intimate way. _ _

__"Where are you now?"_ _

__" _Toilets_ ," he sneered, and his voice resonnated a little in the earpiece. He wasn't lying at all and it was making the situation quite funny. _ _

__"The best place to hide," I nodded. With my other hand, my forefinger started fidgetting on the surface of the floor, drawing circles in ths dust._ _

__" _I've shut the speakers down for a few minutes, but they're not stupid, you know they'll find out pretty soon,_ " Duo was mumbling a little, tipping with his fingers on a smooth surface that sounded like made out of porcelain. The toilets basin, probably. " _Sooo, tell me, Quat, is everything really ok?_ " His voice was still teasing me a little and hearing it ade me feel a little more at ease. _ _

__I huffed softly. "Yeah, I told you, everything is fine here."_ _

__" _You know that I don't really care about 'everything' but about 'you', Quat_."_ _

__I could feel his small scolding, like he was talking to a child and it made me smile despite myself. "Y-yeah, I know." There was too many circles on the floor at the moment, and I lifted my finger up to swip it on my trousers._ _

__" _So? You know how persistent I can be!_ "_ _

__"I know that too for sure!" I laughed._ _

__The second after, I was sighing again. "I'm ok, but..."_ _

__" _You can't feel us?_ "_ _

__I gulped at his words. Duo knew a little about my abilities, found it out by himself one day. I couldn't hide it to him that time. We were alone in a mission, waiting patiently until I got suddely attacked by a regiment of violent feelings I couldn't take. The result had been quite awful, and even today I wasn't sure if I would have succeed against it if I'd been alone at that moment._ _

__I nodded, even if Duo couldn't see me, then added after a silence. "Yes. I'm a little lost, I have to admit."_ _

__" _Don't worry, they don't notice anything. You know how insensible they are to people's feelings and stuff..._ "_ _

__"You're right," I chuckled. The fact that Trowa didn't react to my way of being at the momen was still quite painful, but it was him. It was normal. He wouldn't show any of his own feelings, any of his thougts, and I had persuade myself not to enter his mind since the first day we met. I didn't want him to hate me for being different, for being unable to fight my power, for being able to enter his head and heart._ _

__" _What are you thinking about?_ " Duo's voice apeased me somehow, and I pressed the back of my hand to rub my eyes a little. _ _

__"You know, this and that..."_ _

__" _This Trowa and that Trowa?_ " He asked playful. _ _

__"You know me too well," I laughed._ _

__" _We're sharing the same place for years, of course I know you too well!_ "_ _

__Roommating at the Preventers base most of the time had led us to be closer and closer. Duo had accepted those nights when I was fumbling around, waiting for the day to come, my body aching due to my racing abilities. He'd accepted the fact that I wasn't at ease when not naturally using my power to integrate myself in a group of people. I didn't need to scan their hearts, of course, just feeling the way they were reacting to things was enough for me to answer. To answer how they wanted me to. And here was the problem at the moment; Duo and the others were far from me, and through the microphone and earpiece I couldn't feel them and what they were basically thinking. I had to count on the tone of their voices, the noise surrounding them, and it was quite stressful. Even after years dealing with that type of situations, I couldn't take it at its best. I, most of the time, managed to stay in the base, at the control panel, right where _they_ were right now. _ _

__" _Sorry man, I should have been there._ "_ _

__I mirked at Duo's apologies - I knew that he realy meant it - and shook my head uselessly. "Donc be, that not your fault."_ _

__" _I should have been more careful last time, so you wouldn't--_ "_ _

__"Hey hey, stop with that!" I giggled. "You broke your leg, Duo, that's not something piddling!"_ _

__" _Heero took care of his broken leg by himsel when he wasn't even fifteen, remember?_ "_ _

__"You're not Heero, remember?" I replied, rolling my eyes._ _

__" _Yeaaahhh, but--ah shit, they're calling already, I've taken too much time--_ "_ _

__I could hear muffled noises, probably the others' voices and something like they were knocking on the toilets door._ _

__" _Quat, sorry, I--_ "_ _

__"Go back with them, they won't get it if we're communicating in the toilets, you know?"_ _

__" _Mh, right right, I got it!_ "_ _

__I heard the weird sounds of the flush in the microphone, the sound of the lock from the toilets, and then the voices of Heero and Wufei, surely not agreeing with Duo going to the toilets with the microphone._ _

__The light coming through the shutters had slightly changed during our conversation, turning from a light shade of yellow to a soft pink in the room._ _

__" _But you know, Quat, life goes on, okay? So, uh, don't overthink--Well, I mean, you know what I mean--Right?_ "_ _

__His attempt to comfort me was the best in the end; I laughed a little more than before, relaxing against my piece of wall. I was getting used to the smell of the place, my head a little dizzy due to my non-habit._ _

__My eye were burning a little already - rubbing them with the dust all around me had been the worst idea - and I blinked a little at the street and hotel I was spying on. If something had to happen, it would be in no time, si I caught the backpack next to me to bring it closer. My gun wasn't far, actually the first thing coming in my hand with a refill. The second was that dark pull-over, the fabric so thin that it was being almost frowsy and anybody could asked why I still owned such an od cloth. I would have ever answer this question by something else than "I need dishcloth to work"._ _

__It was the only reason I had found to take it from Trowa on the day he anted to throw his oldest and tiniest pull-over in the trashbin, three years ago. I was a bit ashamed whenever I looked at the cloth, but the warm feeling that also filled me was nothing to compare with, and the fabric, soft and rough at the same time under the tip of my fingers, made me smile a little._ _

__" _That's getting a little worrying,_ " I heard Heero in the microphone, and his sudden voice made me jump and leave the pull-over. The gun still in my hands, I started moving the mechanic, making sure that everything would work properly. Just in case. I hated guns. _ _

__"Yeah. The informations we got weren't checked properly this time," I added._ _

__" _No way, Zechs did it hims--_ "_ _

__But I cut him abruptly. "Wait..."_ _

__" _Quatre?_ " Trowa's voice resonnated in my ear, making me frown a little for a second, but the moment right after, I was overrun by many feelings I wasn't having myself at that very moment. _ _

__"Someone's coming," I murmured. A buzz answered at first, and some micro setting noises, then I understood that they had taken Duo's microphone to put my connexion with them on loud speakers and be able to talk freely with me._ _

__" _What? There's nothing on the radar...Do you hear something?_ " I ould picture Wufei and his scowl, probably crossing his arms on his chest, his white traditional chinese shirt buttoned up his neck as usual. _ _

__My fingers started running nervously on the crosier. I could feel them, even if I was unable to say where they were precisely at the moment. But closed enough for me to be able to _feel_ them. _ _

__"Yeah yeah, let's say that...," I sighed. My hands were already trembing. I was good at spying, I was good at fighting in my Gundam. But I wasn't one to often fight by hand, it was rather Heero or Wufei or even Trowa's thing._ _

__" _Quatre? Is everything ok?_ " _ _

__"Yeah, for n--AW!"_ _

__The loud sound of a detonation had amost killed my ears, but what had me yelling from far was more the violent and sudden pain eradiating my shoulder without a warn. Awww shit-shit-shit, as Duo would say. I didn't even take the time to think twice and rolled on my side, trying to see what was coming. I could hear their footstep. Oh man, what a fool. I knew they were close, why didn't I feel them even better, earlier even!?_ _

__" _SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT QUATRE! ANSWER!_ " Duo was almost screaming in the microphone, making the earpiece buzz like hell. " _What happened? You're ok? Hey! QUATRE !_ "_ _

__Hidden behind the old table, I was gritting my teeth due to the pain in my shoulder, pressing my hand still holding the gun on the bleeding wound. I could feel the tacky seep on my fingers, but at that moment my breath, lost and irregular and oh so noisy to my ears, was my main problem._ _

__Focus, Quatre._ _

__"Where is he!?"_ _

__They were here, I could see their dark boots almost shining in the dust._ _

__"Look at there, must be his blood eh!"_ _

__I hold my breath, in my ear I still could hear Duo calling for me. Sorry man, can't answer now, ok?_ _

__"Find him!"_ _

__"Yes sire!"_ _

__They moved quickly, almost running in the same motion. The pain was unbearable, and as the silence was back, I let go of my shoulder, with the hope that the blood wouldn't run any more. The sticky liquid was sticking to my skin all along my arm and I couldn't move it so much without the risk to whine like a baby. Sometimes, I whished I was Heero or some insensible guy like him._ _

__" _Quat? Awwww shit, guys, d'you think he lost the earphone? What was that fucking noise? A shot? Fuck it, d'you think he--Tro, don't look at me like that, man, that's not my fault! Quat-Quat-Quat! ANSWER YOU FUCKER! AW Fei, don't hit me!_ "_ _

__"I'm here," I breathed, keeping my voice low. The microphone was still hanging onto my collar and hadn't fall on the floor -quit a good news or the soldiers might have found it right away the minute before._ _

__" _FOR GOD'S SAKE QUAT!_ " And then I heard Duo growled after something hit him. Probably Heero's fist. Or Wufei's. Weirdest choice in a life. _ _

__I turned around the table, trying to widen my ability's area as much as possible with the hope that I could locate the soldiers. I could feel them. They--_ _

__"Hey, you!"_ _

__I jumped, brandishing my gun in the direction of the voice to fall nose to nose with another gun pointed on me. Shitty day._ _

__"I knew you were here!" He was grossly smiling, taking a step while I was trying to step back. "DON'T MOVE!"_ _

__" _Quat, what's going on again?!_ "_ _

__"That's not my day, Duo..." I swallowed heavily, squinting at the tip of his gun, mine facing but trembling so much that I wasn't sure if it would be of any help._ _

__" _Wha--_ "_ _

__Focus, Quatre, FOCUS!_ _

__His feels. Right. I got it. He was confident, feeling incredibly high, full of happiness -of course-, and I knew for sure that he wouldn't hesitate and pull the trigger. His _thoughts_. Focus, Quatre. Let it come to you, right? Don't obstruct your mind. Let it crawl under your skin, let it make you shiver again and again, let it make you feel nauseus as much as possible if you need it. _ _

__The thrill suddenly hit me._ _

__He was about to--_ _

__" _QUATRE!_ "_ _

__The nasty sound of both our bodies falling on the floor made me wince, my hand still cramped on the crosier of the gun. The sound of the detonation had made my ears buzz again. I had been faster to shoot him, using his own thoughts to be able to do such a thing._ _

__I just hadn't thought about the risks._ _

__We were still connected by the Heart of outer space, and a hint of regret caught me when I felt his death filling me, my heart aching violently as if it was going to explode, beating incredibly fast and low at the same time._ _

__I wailed at first, the nose in the dust of the floor, but soon the pain was nothing to compare with, and even my shoulder felt like a simple scratch. But my heart was like dying, and soon I couldn't breath under the huge pain I was trying to assimilate despite myself._ _

__I'd already killed people on a mission, and the feeling and effect it had on me, due to my Newtype abilities, were devastating. This time, I'd been connected to the guy. It wa even worse than what I'd ever thought. Feeling someone's death was something. Living it, with all your nerves, with all your heart, was something else, and I was there, lying on the floor and almost screaming my pain, my hands trying to reach for my aching chest and do something. In vain._ _

__" _Quat! Quat, calm down man! What's going on?!_ "_ _

__"He--He's dead, he's de--im-ok-he-s-dead" I barely managed to answer something like that between two breathy tries, and ended whining pitifully._ _

__" _Thanks god, but oh dears what's going on!? Quat, pleas tell m--_ "_ _

__That sound, again. Someone had touched Duo who probably had the best place, the closest to the microphone. I cought, dust entering my mouth and nose and I tried spitting it out._ _

__" _Quatre?_ "_ _

__I couldn't refrain a scream at that moment under a wave of pain and disgust reaching me again, the calm tone of this voice printed in my ears._ _

__" _Focus on my voice, Quatre._ "_ _

__Trowa._ _

__I tried to swallow but the horrible taste of dust at the back of my tongue almost made me puke right away and I cought again, threatening to vomit soon as I was amost rolling on my side._ _

__" _Listen to me,_ " he kept saying. His voice was low, calm, and I loved it. " _I've just got a message from Sally and Une._ "_ _

__"Amazing, uh..." I managed to say, out of breath._ _

__" _They caught these partisans of the Zodiac. You're safe, ok?_ "_ _

__I didn't answer, breathing furiously to fight the pain that made me curl on the floor at the moment._ _

__" _You're safe,_ " he repeated again, and this time, there was something I couldn't quite point out from his voice, something soft I wasn't used to hear fom him -something I had already heard, but so few- and it suddenly made me listen carefully. _ _

__"I--I--"_ _

__" _I've told told them your location, Quatre, Sally's coming pretty soon,_ " he continued. " _Talk to me,_ " he suddenly added. _ _

__I cought._ _

__"It...hurts..." I sputtered._ _

__" _What hurts?_ "_ _

__"Killi--Killing hurts--"_ _

__" _I know,_ " he softly answered. No one was talking around him, nd for a moment I wondered if he was alone. But I hadn't heard any sound proving that they'd left, at any moment. They were here, silent as Trowa was talking. As he was taking care of me. " _But you're alive, Quatre, thanks god you're alive._ "_ _

__I didn't need my power to know how much he meant with these words. Trowa Barton wasn't one to show his feelings to others, yet tell them nice things. But sometimes, it happened and in those moments, I could feel my heart filling with a sweet sensation._ _

__" _I'm waiting for you Quatre, ok? Wait for a little, it's gonna be ok. How do you feel?_ " _ _

__"My shoulder hurts," I winced with a low and scratchy voice when I felt the pain returning to my brain. Slowly, listening to Trowa had me coming back from the limpo of my Heart. "Guess it bled too much, I'm feeling dizzy--"  
" _Hang on._ "_ _

__I snereed a little at his words. "No choice! I don't want to die like that."_ _

__He had a calm and soft laughter, something I reraly heard or him. " _Glad to hear that._ "_ _

__A feeling of fear and worrying at the same time hit me and for a second I wondered if I was reaching Towa's heart through the microphone--_ _

__"Winner! Oh god, thanks god you're alive!"_ _

__But no. From my foetal position, I could only see Sally Po's dark boots but I knew her voice._ _

__" _Who's it?_ " I heard Trowa aked right away. _ _

__"Sally," I breathed. "She's here. I'm off guys..."_ _

__" _Wait, Quatre, don't cut the--_ "_ _

__I rolled on my back, coughing at the effort and whining a little. I hated that type of second effect my power had on me, my whole body tensed and sore. The earpiece had fallen from my ear and I could still hear his voice calling from far in the microphone.  
Sally kneeled by my side. "Remember me, Winner?"_ _

__"How not to." I smiled. "Glad to see you..."_ _

__"Don't be a sweetheart when you're in such a situation," she sighed. "The helicopter is coming soon, Une's gonna help us."_ _

__"Thank you."_ _

__Actually, I don't remember anything from after this moment. Maybe her voice calling for me after I passed out._ _

__I wanted Trowa's voice to call for me like that. Not with that calm tone of his, even thought I liked it so much._ _

__But, sometimes, I wanted him to scream for me._ _

__What a fool._ _

__It was going to kill me someday, for sure._ _


End file.
